Something I struggle with on a regular basis is the way I still don’t feel like I “belong” in the gym.
I know I don’t have to tell you this, but this is a lie. I belong in the gym just as much as anyone else who pays to go there. But that little voice in my head is forever saying “who do you think you are?”
And on some level there’s a disconnect. Yes, I know what I’m doing but I don’t always know what I’m doing. You could talk to me all day about lat pull downs and my eyes would glaze over and I’d be like “Uh…I don’t think I know what that is.”
And then you would say, “What’s that noise?” and I would say, “Oh, that’s just my trainer beating his head against the wall because we do those every week, I just forgot the name.”
Ultimately, I might do legitimate work but I certainly don’t feel like a legitimate athlete. Which is why it’s easy for me to dismiss all of those “rules” and “guidelines” for people who exercise. Like making sure I drink enough water, get enough sleep, take my vitamins, etc.
Or, you know, remembering to stretch. At all. Ever. (Spoiler alert)
Those things are for people who belong in the gym. People who are legitimate athletes. Not people like me.
I guess you know where this is going, huh?
I didn’t follow the rules and now I’m on the shame list. I’m not hurt. I’m just…not right (don’t say it, I know, I was never right to begin with).
Imagine it like this: You squat down and it feels like your belt buckle is digging into your hip. Only you’re not wearing a belt and there’s not actually anything there that could be causing that kind of pressure.
That’s what I have and it means babying my hip by not doing anything (not even swimming) more than walking/yoga until it decides to go away. It also means sitting is really uncomfortable.
Yes, I’m 27 years old and I suddenly have a hip problem. 27 going on 88, I swear.
I’m not going to lie, I’ve had a really bad attitude about it. I’m blaming myself and sulking and it’s not cute. But I’m trying to be thankful it’s not a real injury and just keep swimming (figuratively speaking). And let’s be honest – a year ago I would have accepted this as an excuse to lie on my couch. “Oh, sorry, can’t work out. I’m injured (koff, koff).” Today that won’t happen. I’ll walk. I’ll stretch. I’ll keep doing upper body workouts.
My bad attitude today is a sign of a bigger attitude shift overall. And that’s kind of cool.
It’s not so cool to learn lessons the hard way. And it’s not so cool that this happened the week of Fitbloggin. Not that I so hoped to impress anyone there with my (lack of) mad skills, just that I wanted to go and have fun trying new things. But it could have been worse and at least everyone at Fitbloggin will get it (and I know I won’t be the only one modifying her way through workouts this weekend. Injuries love company, right?). I promise not to bring any of my sulking and moping with me – but I will bring a water bottle!
What lies do you tell yourself? How do you get past the feeling of “not belonging” ?
My name is Kate. I'm a makeup and coffee addict (and total Jesus freak) fighting to lose over 100 pounds. But there's more to life than losing weight. This is where I try to balance it all - and hilarity ensues.
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Even though I was a varsity athlete for 7 years I STILL don’t feel like I belong in the gym. It’s like you need to go to curves first to get skinny enough to a “normal” gym.
I will say one thing that my years of rowing taught me about stretching, though, is that while it’s important to stretch before a workout it’s equally important to stretch after a workout. I never used to and then you have an amazing (or mediocre) workout, go to plop down on the couch and everything immediately tightens up. I think the benefit of sitting on your butt in rowing is that you have to keep things moving and stretched out because you’re already sitting down in the position that causes the tightening!
And that is my extremely long comment about stretching. Hope your hip feels better! Put that heating pad to good use!
You get a gold star for this comment cause I know you hate being the first : ) My “I don’t belong” feeling is even less valid because my gym is full of normal people (most of them older than my parents) not the people who put on full makeup for their workouts or who never leave the weight room and probably can’t speak in more than one syllable. So I should feel right at home, but not so much. And yes, I just need to stretch all the time. Before, after, during.
oh this is something i struggle with all the time! in almost every aspect of what i do. whether it’s work, church, working out, marriage… there’s always my own little personal demon who tells me i don’t belong or what i’m doing is not good enough or i don’t belong or whatever. i just have to keep pushing through, praying through, whatever. saying, “this too shall pass.” regardless, you know you can do it, you know you belong and i’m sorry about your hip
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Ouch, that sucks! I’m also really bad at stretching… even the ones my physical therapist gave me on Monday. Doh!! I tell myself the same thing about my gym and it’s actually kept me away quite a bit. I even go LATE at night so no one’s around to say “why’s that fat girl here?” … such a dumb lie!!
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As some one who’s had hip problems since 21 (going on 88 also, apparently), basically the only exorcise I can do without causing myself more problems is yoga (which still sometimes causes problems) and water aerobics (which I love!). If your gym offers a class you should check it out once you are more on the mended side of “on the mend”. It feels like a good work out, gets ya breathing hard, some nice cardio, but very low impact on the joints.
feel better soon!
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Thanks, Jess! They do offer water aerobics at my gym but I think it costs extra. I’ll have to check.
Oh wow. I never thought of myself doing this before but I totally do it… I don’t follow ‘the rules’ either. I don’t stretch. I don’t think certain things (um, lifting to build muscle) will work right for me. I always think I’m the exception – the only girl who has to do cardio AND lift, the only one who can’t just slap muscle on like it’s no big. And it’s because I don’t view myself as an athlete. CRAZY.
I don’t know why we get stuck in these mind traps even while we know we’re being irrational! But that’s how it goes sometimes and at least awareness is one step in the right direction, right?